fiarra: ([nana] nana. my love shine)
2006-09-02 11:59 pm
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Well... I survived the week and now... I'm home.

The week got very stressful towards the end. Not being able to eat a proper lunch for the entire semester might be somewhat problematic. For now I'm grabbing quick snacks between classes and then holding over till dinner, by which time I'm exhausted, cranky and just generally unamused by the world. Not the best of situations.. but I shall manage. Work has also gotten aggravating just because of the chaos. The system is so new and suddenly the call center has become problematic when we get a staff call. The whole system of authorizations and transfering of calls is so confusing and I can't help but feel I've messed up somewhere when I try to do it. I wanted to cry by the end of my shift on Friday.

In other news, the result of the horrible week of training was 99.25 hours clocked. I'm kinda disappointed I didn't break 100... just cuz it woulda been cool..

So now I'm home. For some reason my parents seem determined to keep me here until Monday which is just strange. I had wanted to go back Sunday afternoon cuz it's 9 months tomorrow so Jacob and I were gonna go out for dinner. But my mom informed me on the way home that we were having guests on Sunday night so I had to stay. I offered to find my own ride which prompted an argument. I asked if Jacob could then come over Sunday for dinner to and then we could return to school that night after the guests were gone. That was not taken well. Today I was told that Jacob could come on Sunday, take me out to dinner near out house and then we could return to my house and leave on Monday. I mentioned wanting to leave that night. And again... they want me to stay until Monday. I guess they could theoretically want to have me around more.. but that never seems to make anyone happy these days so I can hardly imagine why. Perhaps I'm just being selfish again.

Anyway... yeah. monkeys. BRING ON WEEK TWO....maybe?
fiarra: ([pita ten] kobashi. meow)
2006-01-24 07:28 pm
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why is it not 8pm yet?!
I'm sitting here at ResNet answering phones and I want to stab something. The interweb has been slow and we have no idea why. And then people call and it's annoying. Work isn't quite as fun as it used to be anymore. I think I just got tired of dealing with it all..

In other news, I bought the cutest Kero-chan plushie today! *huggles it* Also, last night on the way back from Jacob's I got this amazing idea for an artsy type project, so now I just need to implement it. Should be interesting at any rate.

Also, started watching Paradise Kiss because I finally bought the first manga volume and am fascinated by the outfits. It's a very eclectic anime.. but I find myself liking it.

And now back to working on my project...
fiarra: ([fma] lust. perfect sin)
2006-01-14 10:46 pm
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Oh RezWeb...

Training... wow...
Lessee... we played ice breaker games from 9-noon, including a 1.5 hour game of Mafia... We did another hour or so after lunch of games.. and then we sat for two hours and listened to talking while trying to follow along on laptops that were too slow and deathly to even do anything. I couldnt even check my email on it, it was that slow.

As a result, partway through I got bored and decided to open up a notepad doc and start typing idly while listening... this is what resulted.
training ramblings )

Other training accomplishments include making ninja-style wrist wraps with two of the makeshift blindfolds from the fourth ice breaker game. (read: they cut up old shirts and used those and i stole a couple pieces)

In other news, my lymph nodes around my tonsils appear to be somewhat irritated... when I touch my neck in that area I can feel a little swelling and it hurts if i push too hard. I'm going to have to keep an eye on that one.... =\

*spins* At least we dont have to go into training till 10am tomorrow... and then I'm not working on Monday..... bweeeeee...
fiarra: ([gravi] ryuichi. rawr!)
2006-01-14 08:02 am
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I'm back at uconn now. And I woke up and got out of bed before 8am. All for ResNet Training that seems to consist primarily of ice breakers and... more ice breakers. @_@

My throat also *still* hurts which worries me because while it's not bad enough to make me think I should get it checked, it has presisted since Tuesday and it just vaguely annoying.

My one saving grace is that we're going to get Japanese good tonight for dinner and it's going to be tasty... provided my throat doesnt decide to say "DEATH!" On that note, perhaps I should prepare to take the trek across campus for breakfast, since y'know... I won't be eating till noon... and I will most definitely be hungry before noon what with that whole waking up at 7:30 thing...

*sigh* So tired....
fiarra: (imagination~tennad)
2005-11-17 08:10 pm
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Here I am at work... there have been all of 3 calls since 5pm. And I am sick of playing Minesweeper at this point.

Harry Potter soon.

Vacation not too much longer after. Can't wait but at the same time, I dont wanna go home. I won't miss the drama with certain people... but I'm sure as hell gonna miss the other people. *sigh* Such is life.

At least I have lots of anime to watch...
fiarra: (Default)
2005-10-19 02:59 am
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Oh life...

Yay 3am!! *sigh* Why am I still awake? Oh yeah.. because I have a big exam on Friday and need to memorize 160 scientific plant names before then... Bleh.

The rest of my weekend went well. Sunday was the first time I saw my parents in like a month and it was really nice. Didn't do much Sunday beyond poke around the house and get back to school. I found my old laptop in the basement!!! It's so amazingly awesome I don't know how I thought I could survive college with it. Mac OS 8.1 and a total harddrive space of 775mb. I basically have a cd in laptop form sitting my room here now... *sweatdrop* I must play around with it more after Friday.

Work was the usual blah. Wasn't feeling very good. It was weird. I felt kinda lonely again, but more in the sense that I saw how much fun everyone had this weekend and was feeling kinda left out. Granted, I was home so it was inevitable. I just have brain-type issues I guess. Whatever.

Monday was... interesting to say the least. ZOMG!!! Emily made me this absolutely amazing book. She's taking an art class where she has to practice book binding and stuff. The cover is insanely shiny blue and all the pages are black. Every 7 or so pages there's an insert with an ocean scene. She also gave me some silver pens to go with it. go here: for pictures. It's prettyful.

I also got suspended from work for my Thursday shift. Basically I made a really stupid mistake in the system that was more a result of me not doublechecking my stuff than a bad mistake. But nonetheless, I'm not going to work on thursday, which I suppose I should take as a good thing since I have that huge exam on Friday.

Meh. I dunno... I'm too restless for this.. maybe I'll just try studying some more...
fiarra: (zombie bunny ~yume_icons)
2005-10-03 06:53 pm
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In which Carolina is most definitely traumatized

What a freakin bad day...

So I spend most of the weekend and then stay up late studying for this genetics exam... I'm ready to pwn the hell outta it. Noon today was my duel with destiny.

Then I slept till 3pm... First thought when i shot awake: FUCK!

This was followed by me calling my professor, pretty much sobbing at him. I mean.. the lowest grade is dropped anyway, but there was no way I was gonna miss the easiest test of the semester. -_-;
His answer: I'll think about it, email me and I'll email you back when I decide.

Cue Carolina hating herself and crying for a good half an hour. *sigh*

4:05 I check my email. At 3:40 he had emailed me to say if I went right then, I could take the exam. I was out the door in a minute flat. I took the time to email my ResNet boss to let her know I would be late, grabbed a pencil, my phone and my ResNet shirt (Padma would be proud of me, even in a moment of crisis i was thinking of work).

And then I took my exam... zomg.

And now my tummy hurts.. mostly because I ate 2/3 a package of pepperidge farm cookies and drank a bottle of coke with lime... and I haven't eaten anything else today...

*curls up into a ball*

is the day over yet?
fiarra: (snape implode ~potterpuffs)
2005-09-18 10:52 pm
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It's going to be a long night

I have chips, salsa and a bottle of coke. Hardcore reading to get done, but first.. an update.

I just realized that today marks exactly one month that I've been here at school. August 18th I walked into my dorm room with all my stuff, ready to start a new year. And here I am... my world so totally turned upside down. It's crazy. I'd never thought so much could happen.

Schoolwise I have some issues. Personal matters, relationships, everything have all been making me feel no desire to apply myself to my studies. An issue that I'm going to fix tonight. 4 chapters of genetics reading ahoy!

ResNet has never been better. I've reached the point where I can call a lot of the people I work with friends. It's awesome. And despite the boringness of the call center...I'm loving it. I think that should I decide to stay on with this place next semester... I *might* try for Tier 3... Hah. Ambitious I know, what with my current tech skills... But, no one says I can't try. It's one of those things where I know I should be able to do it, but it will take a lot of work. =) Carolina, Fight!

But still lots of confusion. Questions left unanswered. Crazy shit has gone down recently and I'm still wondering what to make of it. And all I can do is talk to those involved, but that's hard. I dislike confrontation and direct questions. A downfall of mine. A fear of being rejected, being told no. Being told that everything I think is futile in the end. So it keeps me from asking. *sigh* Yeah... Funtastical thoughtful times for me. *facepalm* I can't help but think I do this all to myself with the whole overanalyzing things.. but I can't help it. It's what I do.

A side effect of my own personality. I hide. I conceal. It's a rare thing to see my mask drop at all. I know other people do it too to a certain extent. And it makes me try and figure out what other people are thinking. Gah.

And this isn't helping me read... perhaps I should just drink some soda then go back to this reading.

I just need to know...
fiarra: (x-ray found nothing ~nebula1984)
2005-08-28 05:24 pm
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working... what else

Wow it's been a slow day. Fortunately I actually had the chance to fix a few computers instead of sitting all day in from of the computer signing people into the system. Bleh.

Hmm... well. It's really cruddy out and I'm tired as all hell. But we have class tomorrow and I think I need to be there at 9 am... so I dont even get a break cuz then I'm at work 5-9 answering phones. Vicious cycle and such. But I just want to get busy so I don't have to think about anything at all except my routine. I would love nothing more than to be able to lose myself in the bustle of work and such.

Anime Club stuff is all set pretty much. Those on my f-list who go to anime..... Wednesday September 7 at 9pm in the student union room 303 is our first meeting.

Still so much to plan.

Wow this is a really stream of conscious implusive entry. I think I'll just ramble until I get bored...

The guys are watching the Chappelle show because it's so slow here. We had pizza and popcorn for lunch and now I feel kinda greasy and fat. Not pleasant. I kinda am at a loss for what to do with myself. Confusion and such about certain things. And I want to talk about it with someone, but I also kinda dont because then I can kinda just pretend it doesn't exsist.
i hung out with tyler, marianne and pat last night at the apartment. I tried a sip of Brian's Bacardi Silver Watermelon. It tasted like italian soda which reminds me of Cape Cod and Coffee O. What happened to my summer.. it left all of a sudden. It still hasnt sunk in that school is starting way soon.
I have only 2 classes tomorrow though so it shouldn't be too bad.

Eh... bored of ramblin already. I'm feeling antisocial..... eh. Mostly just tired...

I give up.
fiarra: (Moony-Twinkle Icons)
2005-08-27 07:01 pm
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7pm... 2 more hours. I feel like.. depressed or something. It's annoying as all hell. I kinda just want to run... I dont care where. I just want to run. Too bad I can't. *sigh*

Marianne moved in today. Luckily she liked the room setup and with all her stuff in there is looks awesome. Lots of posters and color and the rug is nice looking. I think this year is going to be good in terms of room setup. But at the same time... damn to school starting. And damn to people filling up the place and making it crowded. I didn't get the solitude that I really needed this summer. And now I doubt I will be getting it.

I don't know what to do. I feel avoidant, but I think I'm doing it for the sake of my own sanity. What little is left. I'm confused. Confusion sparks the instinct to run away. Argh.

My stomach hurts from the food I ate at dinner tonight. it's not fun. I'm trying to ignore it but... it's clearly not working. I'm stressed.

Argh.. serious need to run. Need to get out. Escape. Wow. This sucks. 1.5 hours......

I'm not sure if I want it to end or if I want it to keep going so I dont have to deal with the world outside of resnet.

*dies slowly*
fiarra: (zombie bunny ~yume_icons)
2005-08-26 11:07 pm
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Well I'm alive. If I have to say "Hi. Thank you for calling ResNet, this is Carolina. How may I help you?" I might just have to kill something... added up.. i had maybe a full hour break in the 12 hours... maybe... even dinner was eaten in the call center while answering phones.

I was so shaky when I walked out of there... i felt sick to my stomach, headachey and shaky. Not fun condition to walk across campus in. Luckily I got the hug I needed cuz we ran into Rachel and I got to sob on her shoulder for a while. (well... fake sob at least)

I should probably go to bed... I need to report to my workplace by 9am tomorrow and I'd like to be coherent at least...
fiarra: (just keep smiling ~ushitora_icons)
2005-08-26 04:38 pm
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ringringringring... banana phone...

I've been in the call center since 9am this morning.... and finally there is a moment when I'm not talking to someone. I feel this slow burning in the back of my throat and I'm not so sure I'll be able to talk tomorrow.

I'm still convinced that Padma should have rotated people through here. 12 hours on the phone is a bit much.

(half an hour later)Well we got busy again. I went to dinner and the dining hall is closed. Padma syas she is going to order out for us. *cry* i r hungry now and in need of a break. Meh.

i'm going to be flinching at the sound of the phone by the end of today. *dies*

3.75 hours.... you can do this... i mean... its already been 8... less than 4 should be cake....
fiarra: (perfectsin~care_chan)
2005-08-24 07:00 pm
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nananananananana... RESNET!

Right then. Well... still training and working. But it's all good. This weekend just isn't going to be fun. Friday I'm supposed to be in the call center from 9-9... I fear for my sanity. Like seriously. I plan to ask people from the RECs to call me first to ask for backup. That's a very isolated job... can't move around. I might die. Then Saturday I'm 9-9 at Northwest.... then the same time in Shippee. Oh my god. death.

but as Padma says.. "be peppy!" *runs around grinning* I'm thinking that by 3pm my pep will be pure desperation... *sigh* But it's ok. I've come to find that I like computers more and more and want to learn about them. Like... programming... o_O;; oh well. i'll deal.

I'm realized something. I'm the type of person who has to be the best at everything i do. Like running anime club, taking exams, working at resnet... etc. A big part of what I want in my life is to prove to myself that I have the capability to do things at the best I can. Paired with my independent streak.... well.... I dunno. I need to do a lot of thinking. This isn't fun. Priorities are hard to get straight and I'm trying really hard to just get away. I feel like if I hadn't had to deal with all the crap this summer in the house it would have been ok somewhat. I would have had time to think about myself. *ponders*

I'm trying... *deep breath*

It's been a crazy week. I've been like, super hyper all the time. Forcing myself to look happy to not worry others? Maybe. At any rate, ultimately I'm the only person I can turn to. Again.. independence.

i need to stop rambling....

ps- Two nights ago I sat for 25 min with the lyrics to The Ketchup Song ( open on my computer and the song on repeat. I know it by heart now... I don't think I'll ever get it out of my head....
fiarra: (just keep smiling ~ushitora_icons)
2005-08-21 09:04 pm
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So now that I have time I should update about what I have been up to now that I am back at school perhaps.

Well... the short version is I've been doing training. And as much as I was dreading it before coming here, it's actually been pretty good.

yeah... I had forgotten how awesome some of the people here are, which is kinda sad in a way. I hadn't realized it all summer really, but I spend that whole time not hanging out with people with similar interests. No one to geek about anime to, no one to chill with and watch movies, no one to listen to techno with and laughing at flash cartoons. And now that I'm here, I feel like I need to take advantage of it by hanging out lots cuz I know that once the year hits, it likely won't happen, as sad as that will be.

But yeah... that's about it for what I wanna say I guess... not that it's all, but I'd rather not go into it....... *sigh*

ps- [ profile] littlekellylee yes that was me that you saw in the grey car here at school.
fiarra: (ed!yawn ~teruteruboozu)
2005-08-18 08:57 pm
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Where did my summer go? I'm here..... at school...... oh dear..

Spent a lovely weekend with my family up in Cape Cod. We went to Provincetown. *smirk* Let's say it was eye-opening for my little siblings. I mean... what's more eye-opening than 3 drag queens in shiny dresses on rollerskates? or a burly guy wearing a skirt? It was fun...

Today was the big move-in to school for training. Stopped by ResNet and saw [ profile] emmyceru and checked in. Got some books....My stupid Genetics book is going to cost me $115. Hells no.... online shopping here I come! Yeah..

But now it's lonely... and I have no more summer... and I have to be across campus at 8:30am tomorrow morning and how on earth am i going to manage that!? And then there's anime club....... *dies*

Welcome to school....

ps- 100 usericons? wtf am i going to do with 100 usericons? i dont even use all 43 i have now........ *goes to download more anyway*