INCANDESCENT AND SCINTILLATING!!

[fiarra]

The internets are being amusing tonight.

First: Let's Bible!!
We were trying to figure out what Mary Magdalene would translate to in this comic. I think we decided she's be a crazy ganguro girl. Or possibly a gyaru. I'm still lol'ing.

Second: Twilight by Stephanie Meyer.
aka. published fanfiction. Crappy fanfiction. There was an entry on ONTD about how people compare Meyer to JK Rowling and such. The comments.. pure gold. Someone did a search of a .pdf of Twilight of "beautiful". 36 instances in 260 pages. Most of them were all on the same handful of pages. ADJECTIVES EVERYWHERE.
http://i30.tinypic.com/o8ck1z.png
I tried to read the first paragraph outloud for effect. By the time I got to the part about the "incandescent chest, scintillating arms bare", I was laughing so hard I was in tears.

*dies a little inside*

Comments

[thedreademperor.livejournal.com]

ADVERBS EVERYWHERE!! *coughhack* get out... while you still can... it's too late for me...

[megganisms.livejournal.com]

Actually, Twilight's a fun read! >> it doesn't start out "incandescent chest, scintillating arms bare" that's like...the 2nd or 3rd book...O.o Someone's takin some stuff outta context!!! I won't disagree that it's like fanfiction, but at least it's not as crappy as thy make it sound. And that page? yeah, that's when they go to this meadow and Edward shows Bella what vampires do in the sun (They glitter!) so yeah, that's what that whole passage is about... :D

[megganisms.livejournal.com]

What i meant when i said that's the 2nd or 3rd book was that it's not a common occurance that edward's nekkid and bella's having sexy thought about him until the 2nd/3rd book :D

[thedreademperor.livejournal.com]

It's from the beginning of the thirteenth chapter of the first book, and Bella is a massive Mary Sue Harlot. Who are you? O_o

[starsparkle333.livejournal.com]

That would be Megan, you goose.

[thedreademperor.livejournal.com]

I gathered that moments after I read her comment, when I was awake! I have a dream where one day we can live in a world where VAMPIRES DAZZLE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU ALL!

[starsparkle333.livejournal.com]

That's THE BEST DREAM EVER!!!!

[starsparkle333.livejournal.com]

I wasn't making the point that the whole book reads like a poorly written smut-fic. I was making the point that there is plainly bad writing running rampant throughout the pages. This was the first paragraph of Chapter 13 of book 1, but I could have just as easily pulled something from the beginning of the first chapter. When an author feels the need to use 5 adjectives and like 2 adverbs in a sentence.... all while not maintaining the same tense... something is clearly wrong.

I won't deny that maybe people enjoy reading it. It's the oldest cliche out there, and no matter how many times its re-done, there will always be fans. It just can't be called good writing. Or even mediocre writing

[megganisms.livejournal.com]

Ah! I misunderstood then. I never really analyzed the sentence structure or anything as I was reading it. Mostly because I was looking for something interesting to do (i was in upstate new york where there is nothing going on) and probably was more desperate for something to read than something that was really good. Rabid fangirl in me rose up at your saying it read like a bad fic. Clearly, it's probably true. But if there's nothing going on, better bad fic than no fic at all. :/

[milkteamilk.livejournal.com]

'mona lisa awakening' and that whole series by a woman simply named sunny is likewise horrible. Look for some reviews.

[starsparkle333.livejournal.com]

Oh my... I looked it up and I don't think I have any words.