I have no motivation today. I have class in 5 minutes... and a pile of midterms that need to be graded just sitting here. I have serious motivation issues like all the time. I am supposed to be writing this proposal for an NSF fellowship. I don't even need to do the research for it.. just write something. And I'm like.. scared that I'm going to write something up, give it to my advisor.. and he's going to hate it and think i'm stupid and then maybe wonder why he took me on as a student. I know I would not have been accepted if they didn't think I could do it... but I feel really insecure. =\ Someone tell me I'm not stupid.

The rest of the Maine trip went well though. It was nice the second day if a bit windy. And I actually managed to accomplish something after I wrote that last entry. This week has seriously been dragging as a result of a week away. I was doing so well before we left and now it's a struggle again.

On Saturday I went into the city to watch my brother's cross-country meet. Did you know that meets require a lot of audience running too? Yea.. I didn't either. But it was nice to see him.. and my parents came up so we got a late lunch together after. I figured out some of the Chinatown area and then my dad bought me a soft warm fuzzy hoodie from Eddie Bauer as an early bday present. I'm wearing it now. Except then I went off to Newbury St and ended up in American Apparel. I knew that I was going to end up buying the black and white stripey GQ hoodie! I should not have done it, but... I wanted tooooo. *whine* I also went into Urban Outfitters, but it was really crowded and messy so I gave up. Instead I went to Sephora and bought more nailpolish. My addictions, let me show you them!

I LOVE GLEE! Anyone else watching? I've managed to talk people around here into watching it, but they all watch it delayed so I can't flail at people for a few days after the episode. I was considering buying the music on iTunes, except then I saw that the vol 1 ost for it is coming out nov 3rd.. and it has Defying Gravity on it (my fave song from Wicked!!). So I am waiting. Downloaded what was out for now. :3

Also, anyone following me on twitter will be seeing a lot of my caps-lock filled flailing. Just gonna say.. it's not going to let up. We haven't even heard a snippet of ANY of Adam's new songs. I'm not counting the 2012 preview simply because it's not going to be on his cd and is reportedly not representative of his album sound. THEY ARE SUCH TEASES. So yes... if this is already happening without any music... then I might just explode and die when we get to hear something. JUST SAYIN.

Ok I have.. 20 minutes before I need to eat lunch before class. Off I go!

Just added a mess of Merlin icons to my rotation. I have 125 icons now. wut. Two left empty for Gurren Lagann icons once they are no longer spoilers. xD

Dude.. we finally reached time-skip in anime club and it is SO EPIC. But I am so scared for later certain episodes where I sat and sobbed for like 10 minutes when they finished. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS DAMNIT. Butbutbut... omg so epic.... *shuts up*

First two days of work have been cool. I need tobuy.. a lot more black shirts. xD It's all I can wear with black pants.. and shoes. Incidentally, I needed black sneaker-y shoes anyway. Training has been kinda a whirl at this point. And gosh table numbering systems are confusing. Monday I took like 3 parties to the wrong table. And today there was one. I am made of so much fail. And then I feel soooo bad. T_T And I have to take this test on Thursday to see if I pass since this is still technically probation. waaah.... And I need to work on my small talk. I feel so lame asking about the weather ALL THE TIME. ughughugh.... this is hard. But I will get through it. ^^ At least everyone I'm working with has been nice. It's a bit intimidating since they all know each other and chat easily. And I'm seriously having issues remembering names half the time. And half the bussers are hispanic of some sort and they all talk to me in Spanish as I'm wandering around. lulz.

Speaking of anime (yknow.. a paragraph ago..), I am torrenting La Corda d'Oro. I saw a screenshot of it and pretty much had a strong craving for music anime. I still need to watch Nodame Paris Chapter, but part of me feels like I'm not ready for that just yet. So perhaps Corda can fill that hole for a bit.

But first I need to watch more Merlin! :o Damnit BBC... damn you and your historically inaccurate but totally addicting shows.

On that note. I DONT KNOW WHERE MY ROBIN HOOD SEASON 1 DVD 1 DISC IS. *CRYYY* I'm pretty sure it got left at Justin and Max's apartment. T_T I want it back.. I need to finish watching the series. And I promised my sister I would watch with her so I need to start at the beginning.. *woe*

...This has totally gone on a weird tangent.

*eyes piles of cosplay supplies in the corner* I wanna work on this stuff tomorrow.. but instead I am driving my brother to Rhode Island so he can see his girlfriend. *sigh* I am totally making him pay for the gas in my empty car... and Starbucks before we leave... and maybe something else. Cuz he owes me big... giving up my day-off to wake up before noon and drive around. bah.