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The stuff history is made of...
Urgh... I'm so tired. Why is the day not over yet so I can just go to anime club and chill for a while. So, UCONN made history and like like since both of our teams won the NCAA tounaments. Yeah... Coolness, but I realized it ultimately doesn't affect me in the slightest, except maybe giving me a reason to actually like being here, so I've just let it fall to the back of my mind. Whoohoo... go UCONN... etc.... *insert cheering here* I had a fun time yesterday day though, looking at all the pictures of looting and destruction. Many fires and a few over turned cars. Again, I don't have the pictures yet. But I have a few favorites that will be up here eventually. Moving on...
Been much too long a day. Slept 4.5 hours last night. I actually slept right through my psychology lecture this morning. I tried to get up, but my head was too fuzzy. Thus, again I depend on Heather for the notes. *sigh* Oh well... Japanese, philosophy, more japanese in 20 minutes. It's becoming this sad uninteresting cycle of crap. And I have to do my math homework tonight instead of waiting till tomorrow morning when I'll just do a crappy job. Yes... work... I haven't done that in a while. Everything's just kind of creeping up on me at this point. I've just realized that I'll have finished a whole year of college in less than a month. It feels like I haven't accomplished anything real though. I've just been coasting... and I'm losing the momentum if my grades are any indication. Unless I do some major work in psych, I have a B in there. Japanese is pretty much a lost cause and it pisses me off. Although I know there was one assignment that I never finished and he said I could for more points. I think I may have to ask him to let me turn it in now. *is hopeful* I can't find the paper assignment for my bio class. My philosophy grade is dependant on the grade I get on the last paper and my last math test was a B so I need an A on the next one and the final. So yeah.... not up to the standard I suppose.
ACK! I'm doing it again. I'm beating myself up over something trivial. And I'm also complaining even when I'm doing just fine. My expectations for myself are way too high is the problem. It doesn't help that my mom was telling me last night that my sister got a C in english this past quarter (she's in 6th grade) and they they are disappointed in her. And how I'm the only one who is doing well and making them proud. But now I barely squeaked by with a B- on the last psych test and I know I'm gonna get looks and subdued tones over the phone at that news. *sigh* Sad as it sounds, too much of my happiness depends on my grades and the approval this garners from my parents because it's been that way my whole life. And I'm trying to break from that, but it doesn't work when my parents constantly tell me how my bro and sis aren't doing so hot (even though they are) and how at least they have one kid making them proud. And then all this makes me wonder what sort of psychological manipulation is going on and how this gonna affect everyone in the end. And then I wonder if maybe I'm taking this too seriously and I just need to chill and let life take it's course. AHHHH!!! *brain implodes* too much thought... And now I'm going to be late to japanese... rargh...
I'll have a meme up later. I think I'm going to need some chill time. That and laundry. I'm wearing my last pair of socks right now.
Been much too long a day. Slept 4.5 hours last night. I actually slept right through my psychology lecture this morning. I tried to get up, but my head was too fuzzy. Thus, again I depend on Heather for the notes. *sigh* Oh well... Japanese, philosophy, more japanese in 20 minutes. It's becoming this sad uninteresting cycle of crap. And I have to do my math homework tonight instead of waiting till tomorrow morning when I'll just do a crappy job. Yes... work... I haven't done that in a while. Everything's just kind of creeping up on me at this point. I've just realized that I'll have finished a whole year of college in less than a month. It feels like I haven't accomplished anything real though. I've just been coasting... and I'm losing the momentum if my grades are any indication. Unless I do some major work in psych, I have a B in there. Japanese is pretty much a lost cause and it pisses me off. Although I know there was one assignment that I never finished and he said I could for more points. I think I may have to ask him to let me turn it in now. *is hopeful* I can't find the paper assignment for my bio class. My philosophy grade is dependant on the grade I get on the last paper and my last math test was a B so I need an A on the next one and the final. So yeah.... not up to the standard I suppose.
ACK! I'm doing it again. I'm beating myself up over something trivial. And I'm also complaining even when I'm doing just fine. My expectations for myself are way too high is the problem. It doesn't help that my mom was telling me last night that my sister got a C in english this past quarter (she's in 6th grade) and they they are disappointed in her. And how I'm the only one who is doing well and making them proud. But now I barely squeaked by with a B- on the last psych test and I know I'm gonna get looks and subdued tones over the phone at that news. *sigh* Sad as it sounds, too much of my happiness depends on my grades and the approval this garners from my parents because it's been that way my whole life. And I'm trying to break from that, but it doesn't work when my parents constantly tell me how my bro and sis aren't doing so hot (even though they are) and how at least they have one kid making them proud. And then all this makes me wonder what sort of psychological manipulation is going on and how this gonna affect everyone in the end. And then I wonder if maybe I'm taking this too seriously and I just need to chill and let life take it's course. AHHHH!!! *brain implodes* too much thought... And now I'm going to be late to japanese... rargh...
I'll have a meme up later. I think I'm going to need some chill time. That and laundry. I'm wearing my last pair of socks right now.
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*^.^* Good luck to you though in your college endevours!! (I think I spelled that wrong)