idle ponderings

[fiarra]

It was nice day. Started off with presents. My brother is a little snot and complained that some of his presents weren't exactly what he wanted. That was annoying. But whatever.

Finally got my shit together for the vacation we're leaving on tomorrow. 3 days of skiing... maybe all my random thoughts and doubts can all fly out of my head while i'm trying not to fall down a mountain. And then maybe it'll all make sense.

I feel so emo.. it's kinda lame. My mind is just in a strange place where it's trying to hide from all the thinking I've been doing. It's tiring and part of the reason I'm glad I can finally get away for a few days. I'll have other things to worry about... more normal things... like not dying... or killing someone else with my ski poles. I guess part of the problem is the way I second-guess myself. One second I'm sure I know what I want.. and the next my mind is screaming at me about being stupid.. and everything crumbles all over again. And of course along the way, I can't even sit and concentrate on anything concrete. I'm too busy running circles in my mind.

ugh.

Anyway... I'll be gone till the 30th. If you know my cell.. you know how to reach me. Otherwise... maybe I'll try that nifty txt-post thing...

*shrug*

Comments

[masamisama.livejournal.com]

is it me? or are we a little similar in how one second we think we know whats goin on and the next its a complete disaster?! its like... i will be so sure about something, and the next second i'll be second guessing it, ultimately resulting in me being absolutely negative and denying any sort of feeling i had initially.... (i understand what you're going through!)...don't die skiing!!!

[thedreademperor.livejournal.com]

go ski! and have funs! Itll help your emo.

[squee-47.livejournal.com]

*HUGS* skiing will at least let you clear your mind. As far as the second guessing goes, i guess you just need to weigh everything carefully, then commit yourself to a plan and shut out your doubts. Otherwise youll spin circles forever. You can do it, though. I know you can. =)