fiarra: ([kare kano] yukino. blank stare)
2012-08-24 04:08 pm

odds and ends

I have actually managed to do a bit of data analysis this week. Of course now I have no idea what to do with the numbers, but I will take what I can get. I'm still stuck with this block on writing my proposal. I have a general outline and a list of references.. but every time I open the word document, I can feel the urge to throw my laptop and run away to Alaska rising. This, more than anything, is what convinces me that I need to get out of academia and find something else to do with my life. So yup, yay school. (On an semi-related note, they still haven't given us our TA assignments and it's frustrating because I just want to KNOW. I HAVE A LIFE TO PLAN, SCHOOL.)

On a more personal note, I have had some wicked insomnia for the past 2 weeks and it's driving me a little bit insane. I haven't been able to fall asleep before 3am and often it's closer to 4am when I am staring at my ceiling and wishing for death. I think that part of the problem is that I have to sleep with a fan on me because summer and it's really difficult for me to find sleep when there is moving air on me. I like to curl up under blankets and be warm, but not too warm... and having air messes it all up. I have tried going to bed at midnight/1am. I have tried finally crawling into bed at 2:30. I tried drinking herbal tea (no caffeine) the other night and all that happened was that I didn't fall asleep till 3:30 and then was wide awake at 7:30am. And waking up that early didn't even help because it still took me till 4am to sleep the next night. The main problem is that when I can't fall asleep till that late, I end up sleeping through all my alarms and then wake up at noon feeling gross. Ugh, so frustrated.

I am off to NYC this weekend to hang out with people, so maybe that will help. The bus is at 9am, which means I need to leave the house between 7-7:30 and I am honestly considering just not sleeping at all and then sleeping 4 hours on the bus. Uggghhh.

In other news, I finished reading The Fault in Our Stars last night and cried for about half an hour.
fiarra: ([gurren lagann] boota. sleepy)
2012-07-02 06:19 pm


Sooooo.... I ended up surviving the end of the summer semester just fine. And I also got my letter for my TA next fall, which is.... really fast for my school? I am convinced that this means everything will go horribly wrong by the time fall gets here. Because, let's be real, this is my life.

The past week has been a bit of a whirlwind because my grandmother left this past wednesday, so I spent the weekend attempting to finish all my grading and spending as much time as possible with her. Then, I went back to Boston on Monday to get work in order so I could leave again on Thursday. I also spent a lot of those couple days crafting. I have gotten good at making these tote bags and after I make the couple friends have asked me for, I am considering throwing the rest I make on etsy. We shall see.

In other news, I am currently on vacation with my family. We are currently in Maryland, right by a bit of the Bay. It has been nice, minus the part where we didn't have power on Saturday and most of Sunday. It was very hot and humid and generally miserable, but now that the power is back, there has been much basking in the A/C after going down to the beach to read in the sun.

I should probably be glad about the break, but the back of my mind is worried about all the things I need to get done before comic con. I am determined to try and finish this costume before I leave. Plus packing... and dealing with work... and bah!

SPEAKING OF WHICH.. the schedule was finally released and I am stuck with the agonizing realization that the Grimm panel is scheduled right in the middle of the WB panel, which is going to include the Hobbit. Literally, I weep. I am still trying to decide what to do, although, right now I am leaning towards the Grimm panel because it will probably be less stress and less time sitting in line and sitting through things I don't actually care about.
fiarra: ([gurren lagann] boota. sleepy)
2012-06-10 12:24 am

pipe down and carry on.

And thus the world goes on.

I am hanging out in my sister's room as usual. My siblings have deserted me... as they have every other weekend I am here. It's honestly a bit depressing. I kinda let most of my friendships fade away after college happened (and honestly it started before that) so I never make the effort of contacting anyone when I am in town. As a result, I spend a lot of my nights here just hanging out on the internet and reading.

But enough of that pity party. Celebrate West Hartford is this weekend and I went today to browse the art, buy many things and eat too much. My favorite artist every year is James Polisky. I have bought so much of his art that he recognizes me every time I visit. This year I feel in love with this print and ended up buying it, even though I said that I was only going to buy some postcards. (I have no more wall space in my bedroom. Am going to have to start lining my stairs with art.) He was really nice and also threw in a free postcard anyway.

So yes, that happened. Also a snocone. A blue one. Noms.

In other news, I was at the mall yesterday and I feel this crazy urge to buy a bunch of clothing to change up my style a bit. (....not that there is much to change since I live in tshirts, jeans and hoodies, BUT I WANT TO LOOK NICE SOMETIMES), but then I realized that I still need to lose like 15 more pounds before I feel okay with it. SO.....yup. Then I went home instead. MY LIFE IS JUST SO INTERESTING!! :D

Tomorrow I have plans to hang out with Kadie and watch the One Direction tour DVD, because I fell down that rabbit hole when I wasn't paying attention. It's going to be awesome.

edit: I was planning on going to see Frankenstein and go to the Boston Sherlock meetup next Sunday... except then I realized that the 17th is Father's Day so I can't be in Boston for it at all. I am sad, but I guess I at least have already seen the show? :|
fiarra: ([merlin bbc] sort of fairytale)
2012-03-02 01:30 am

this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me

I really need to start trying to sleep earlier. The problem is that once it hits past like... 2:30am, I start getting really mopey about everything in life and wanting to word-vomit feelings all over my journal that the world doesn't need to see. Last night I stared at the blank entry page for a while and then realized that anything I typed would be a) not good enough and b) far too revealing.

And now I am still awake because I got home and curled up in bed on my Kindle... and ended up falling asleep at 7:00. I woke up at 10 feeling groggy and very hungry. #failure


First, I still have ALL THE DEAN WINCHESTER FEELINGS. Possibly the less said about that, the better. I am currently mid-season 6 and starting to get sad that I will reach the end of the episodes. Fortunately, I will still have White Collar and SGA to catch up on/finish after that.

In other news, I am starting a rewatch of BBC's Robin Hood. I'd forgotten how cheesy it is, but I can tell I'm going to fall in love with it again. It holds a special place in my heart since it's the reason I discovered Merlin.

... There was possibly a point to this post before I started typing, but I think I've lost it. *curls up in bed again with kindle*
fiarra: ([digimon] mimi. glee!)
2012-02-28 11:43 am

starships are meant to fly

Time for the weekly round-up. Who's excited?! ... Yeah, I thought so.

So things. Teaching is... teaching, which is all I will say about that. Spring Break is next week though, which means a break from the teaching and that is very exciting. Today in lab we dissected a starfish and a regular fish. I heard someone mention in the back that the starfish "doesn't look anything like Patrick". Also, watching 19 students attempt to dissect a fish is surprisingly funny.

The SPN train rolls on. The season 5 finale may have destroyed me for like... an hour. I didn't realize I had SO MANY FEELINGS, but then everything happened and I am suddenly crying at my laptop screen. Urm, yes. Dean remains my favorite. Sam without a soul is somehow more tolerable than normal Sam. And I continue to be amused by/adore Crowley despite the show's best efforts to make me dislike him. He just wants to expand hell, okay. (I apparently have a lot of fun with characters who are unrepentantly on their own side - Pottermore was right to put me in Slytherin).

Uh... what else am I paying attention to now? There is that CBS Sherlock thing, which... has caused a lot of rage. The current update being that Lucy Liu is going to be Watson - as a failed doctor, now assistant? I remain skeptical, but am mostly amused by all the anger. I don't agree with most of the changes, but so much of tv is derivative of Sherlock and right now I am looking at it as more of the same... just much more literally? *shrug*

BUT REALLY I AM JUST EXCITED BECAUSE OH MY GOD STAR TREK IS A THING THAT IS HAPPENING. First there were all those pics of ZQ and Benedict and Zoe. And now there is THIS VIDEO of fight choreography and dsnalkg;sdajld. Hi, I am very excited. I am going to eat up every damn spoiler we get.

Timeless is going to be delivered to my kindle tomorrow AND I CAN'T WAIT TO READ. Professor Lyall! Alexia! EVERYONE! YAY!

In other news, I am trying to bento again because I am spending too much money on buying lunch lately. I am an adult!

The last episode was so good. And this week's preview looks amazing. CAPTAIN RENARD PLEASE TELL ME ALL YOUR SECRETS.
fiarra: ([pretear] himeno. xrays found nothing)
2012-02-21 03:35 pm

like a monkey on the sun, it was too hot to live

So... I am like 5 years late to this party, but I appear to have fallen down the Supernatural rabbit hole.

Last week [ profile] manderkitty was like, hi I want to catch up on Supernatural. Mostly this was inspired by the episode where Jensen Ackles is wearing a 40s style suit and being awesome. Also, the recent carnival episode. Now, I have resisted this show for years. I own seasons 1, 2 and 4 on DVD and had only ever gotten through a handful of s1 episodes before I ran away. (Mostly because the online fandom is batshit, and I just don't need that in my life).

So, now it's Tuesday and we've watched all of s4, half of s5... and a handful of earlier eps to make up for plot gaps that I needed to see. I have also acquired a Netflix account? *sigh* I swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Now I am just lost in this abyss of endless amounts of angst and pain.... tempered by occasional visits to places like TV Land.

Also I just need to state for the public record that Dean and Castiel are my favorites.

At some point I will go back and actually watch the earlier seasons. This is mostly because I posted about the show on facebook and apparently people care more about my show watching habits than my ACTUAL REAL LIFE. So many feelings. So many.

In other news, it is not a good sign when I am counting the number of correct answers on an exam because it is easier to count up the grade that way.
fiarra: ([sailor moon] usagi. moonlight)
2012-01-30 11:20 am

how can i love when i'm afraid to fall

Another Monday, another 3 hours of sitting in the teaching labs.

At least today I had a student stop by for Excel help for about 5 minutes. This does not change the fact that I am frightfully hungry and have no hope of food for another 2 hours. I am craving grilled cheese again (which is weird, I had never even eaten a grilled cheese sandwich until I hit college) so I might have to stop at the grocery store on the way home. Also, it's cold in this lab. /mope.

I had a lovely weekend of avoiding everything I meant to do! I had all this grading scattered around my room and never got to it. Now I am staring at it in dawning horror because I need to do at least half of it by 8am tomorrow.

At least I used my new blender twice? Mmmmm.. smoothies...

this has been a post
fiarra: ([gurren lagann] boota. sleepy)
2012-01-07 01:12 am

cough syrup dreams

So I am officially sick. It's been a while and I had kinda forgotten how miserable life is when you're dealing with a cold. My Tues-Weds sore throat turned into full-out coughing on Thursday and today has been cough-central with some bonus sneeze-attacks and runny nose. I am thinking that this means I am almost done. Luckily I have the weekend to do nothing but rest.

I will honestly be ok so long as I don't have another night like last night. I had to sleep propped up on pillows and was basically waking up constantly to cough desperately until I just wanted to cry. Then sometime around 6am, I snapped awake coughing and was really disoriented and everything was weird. I can only assume that it was a bad reaction to the cough syrup, but it's the stuff I always take for colds.. so idk.

Before I sleep, I know I said I wasn't going to set any resolutions for 2012, but maybe I lied a little bit. Here are some goals for my year:
1. Get back down to a weight I am happy with (I have lost about 5 lbs in the past 2 months by not drinking soda, now I just need to do better)
2. Read at least 50 books (I hit 30 in 2011!)
3. I have a 30 minute cookbook and I want to try and use it at least once a week to try something new, even if it's just a marinade recipe or a new dressing.

I hope all you are feeling much healthier than me lately!
fiarra: (Default)
2011-12-31 01:15 am

ugh *flops*

Well, I'm back from vacation and in typical fashion... I don't even get to recover from that before the world throws something at me. (uh, warning for some whining/etc ahead?)

First, I just checked my school email and apparently something this week someone broke into the lab (by smashing the glass on one of the doors) and stole 2 computers, the trash can and a cart (probably to take the computers). One of the computers was the one that I use at my desk. So now I'm like, fuck I had that set to keep me logged in on EVERYTHING because it was my personal comp and I had a password set to log into the system. Now I am thinking I need to change my password for EVERYTHING, just in case attempts are made to log into it. Also, I had a folder with my laptop backup on there and I suspect it at least contains some files that had my social security number on them. So.. that's awesome.

Also I am super emo about New Year's Eve because I decided to stay here to spend it with my family, but both my siblings are going out that night and my parents got invited to a thing at someone's house (this someone being the parents of one of my brother's friends, who I don't know). I can't decide if it will suck more to stay home alone and ring in the new year while sitting with twitter open or not. At least if I'm home alone, I can be online. If I go to this party, I will get to sit and talk to people I don't know and feel super lame because I basically don't have any friends in town anymore.

Also, as I was dealing with the computer thing, my mom came in my room to tell me I should go to the party because I am an adult so I should be able to go talk to people I don't know. And it sounds like the most painful, awkward and terrible thing to do with myself to end 2011. *sigh*
fiarra: ([azu] tomo. chibi-flail)
2011-12-16 02:44 pm


Ahaha today has been a total mess of flailing over various things. Work? What is this work you speak of?

But first, my mini-vacation! I went down to FL for a few days. It was rainy for most of the time (except the day I left, LAME) but it was also nearly 70*, so it was awesome. Warm rain doesn't bother me. :) We got to go to the beach for a bit on Monday afternoon and walk around. Since it was rainy, the waves were awesome. I also collected some cool shells, because I am secretly five years old. And of course, we ended up marathoning the last third of Mentalist s2 and the first few eps of s3. MY FEELINGS ABOUT PATRICK JANE, LET ME SHOW YOU THEM. (No really, so many feelings).

Then I came back on Tuesday and I have been mopey the rest of the week. We had our lab holiday lunch yesterday and my secret gift person got me nail polish in colors I don't actually have, so that is exciting. Now I just have to get through all of next week.

And before the fun rambles, update on my ticket situation! I ended up getting the letter for my 2nd ticket appeal (like 2 days after I got the rejection for the first) and they accepted that one. The silly part being that I had used the exact same wording on both my email forms asking for them to remove the late fee. So I paid that one and send in the appeal hearing request for the other one. So lame. We will see how it goes. :)


- Adam's new single leaked. IT IS FANTASTIC and my poor account makes me look like a crazy person. spoiler alert: i am a crazy person

- Watching people fall in love with Suits is so satisfying for me. Everyone should love that show and I have all the feelings about Harvey Spector because he is awesome and everyone should see it. That is also. (also donna is my spirit animal, but that's a different story)



- And finally, I have a LOT of feelings about Patrick Jane and his life and his team and his family and the fact that he is a small child in disguise. There are so many feelings, in fact, that I will have to put it in a different post. I will however say that I want the de-aged Jane fic where he is suddenly a child and the team has to take care of him... and they realize along the way that exactly nothing changes when he is 5 years old, vs when he is an adult.
fiarra: ([hp] snape. brain implode)
2011-12-13 10:50 pm

halp me, livejournal

you're my only hope. or something.

We are doing a lab secret gift exchange. Of course, since this is my life, I managed to pull my advisor's name from the pool. There are only 6 people, so there is no way that people won't know who is responsible for each gift.

....What is a good $8-max gift for your thesis advisor? (My only backup plan right now is to buy some candy... and like... a wintery mug. I AM SO LAME GOD)
fiarra: ([makeup] spilled nail polish)
2011-12-06 01:30 pm



I might be a little hyper on caffeine right now, so... lol, bear with me?

Had a fabulous weekend of doing nothing at all, except for going to craft night for a while on Saturday. Of course, this was after the most miserable Friday EVER. Basically (TMI ALERT?) I had crazy cramps and a low-level headache all day and I had zero meds in my bag. Then, I decided to go to the grad student happy hour and had like three beers and some snacks. By the time I got home, my head hurt so much I could barely see and everything was pain. I managed to get some water and meds in me and then passed out for 3 hours. Not my best plan. ANYWAY.

Yesterday was the last day of teaching this semester. My students had their lab practical (which I have to grade today, ick) and now I won't have to deal with them until the day of the final which I have to proctor. So yay for surviving another semester!

I had a lot of feelings about Hawaii Five-0 last night, as usual. I may have to vent about it later, but no one cares so... *shifty eyes*

In other news, I made a cart of all the Glitter Gal and Hits no Olimpo nail polish that I want and it was $104 worth of polish. .... I narrowed it down to half my wishlist and bought it. WAY TO GO SELF, YOU DID NOT MEAN TO DO THAT. I am such a sucker for these holographic polishes though! So shiny. From Glitter Gal I got Lizard Belly, Light As a Feather, Green and Dark Purple. I also got Hera from the Hits no Olimpo collection.

And now I should possibly get some lunch to try and balance out all this caffeine.
fiarra: ([h50] steve. bamf with a gun)
2011-11-04 04:37 pm

everything is wrong

Ugh, I am really glad it's Friday because I am so done with everything right now.

My parents have power back, so that's good. But then I was mail-chatting with my mom and apparently a girl my brother knew in high school was fatally stabbed by her (ex?)boyfriend last night (story), so tonight's plan is going to be a lengthy phone call with him. According to my mom, he's pretty torn up about it. I feel pretty unequipped for the entire conversation tbh. The world sucks.

Of course, I got this news right after a horridly passive-aggressive email from the teaching lab supervisor about how I am late to office hours. Which... yes, that is under my control, but it's frustrating when I leave the house just after 7:30 (which should be plenty of time to make it by 9am) and still end up in traffic... or waiting for the T.. or whatever. It doesn't help that last week I slept right through TA meeting (ugh) and just.. blah. Mostly I am concerned that I will get a bad TA eval at the end of the semester. Sigh.

I just feel like a pile of blah right now. I have plans for Sunday to go to the movies with [ profile] zorabet but otherwise, I kinda want to curl up and not deal with anything. This probably just means I will spend Saturday eating too much junk food and watching disney movies all day.

Hi, my name is Carolina and I don't know how to deal with my life.
fiarra: ([digimon] wormmon. aww...)
2011-10-12 02:01 pm

i think i'm being haunted by joe jonas

Just a quick update. I have many thinky thoughts to post at some point about school and life and stuff, but right now I am too busy drinking my coffee and waiting for the caffeine to hit.

- I love Spotify because it lets me stream new albums. I also hate Spotify because it does things like tell me that Joe Jonas's album is available for streaming and then I end up listening to it twice and now this one song WILL NOT LEAVE MY HEAD. I need an intervention. That being said, I didn't hate the album? Sigh.

- I answered everyone who gave me a fandom in this post. Go look at my sad excuses for unpopular opinions? idk idk.

- My advisor is not here today, so I am totally just leaving early because it's going to rain later and I'd like to go to the grocery store and then walk home without hating my life.

- School is good. My research is good. yay.

- Sherlock is airing in the US on PBS starting on May 13th. So... that's good. It means we get it via download before the Avengers movie, which has become my new standard for "omg waiting forever".

- Speaking of the Avengers movie... dhisakl';hlfhklsk;lajkl;jd TONY. STEVE. AVENGERS. OMG LOKI. THOR GIGGLES. WHAT. (i have aaaalllll the feelings)

- Also, everyone should go see 50/50 even though it will totally make you cry.

- This ended up being a longer list than expected. I hope everyone is having a lovely day, you should tell me nice things.
fiarra: ([ppl] paramore. hayley with glasses)
2011-09-21 09:52 am


It's the day again. The one where I sit in the empty teaching lab and wait for students who are never actually going to show up to ask questions. My happy discovery of the day is that the awesome closet-nerd high school bio teacher has his class right before my office hours. See, Northeastern lets some local high school have bio lab in the teaching labs, because... something. And this dude is a total nerd. He owns a Thundercats belt buckle, like.. I really just don't know what to say. Basically, I want to be his friend. So that will be my reward for actually showing up to office hours on time.

Today's LivingSocial deal is $8 tickets to the aquarium (plus 10% off either the food place or the gift shop). CLICK HERE Of course I bought it because I still have not been there and if I can get in for $8 and reduced food price... then sign me up!

[ profile] ladies_fest
[ profile] ladies_fest
[ profile] ladies_fest

If you are not prompting.. why are you still here?

Yesterday I stayed home and did lots of school reading. It was good. I probably should have gone to the lab, but I woke up and just didn't feel like it. Sometimes I just need a day when I'm doing work but also not interacting with anyone in person.

Then I watched 6 hours of Young Indiana Jones which.. yea. that happened.
fiarra: ([loveless] ritsuka. !!)
2011-09-14 10:29 am

in which loki is the price of egypt, james is a kitty and tom hardy hugs ALL THE PEOPLE

I am currently sitting in am empty lab. I WAS sitting in the dark, because I am a creature of the night... but the lab supervisor just walked in and turned on alll the lights. Noooooo. We had lab on Monday and half the other sections for my class have not even met yet... so, yeah.


First, if you are a writer, you should totally go JOIN [ profile] ladies_fest. Prompting starts on Saturday. Join so you can write about ladies being awesome!

I have been getting super into the Marvel comics fandom lately (mostly in the form of GIVE ME ALL THE TONY STARK AND STEVE ROGERS IN THE UNIVERSE, INTERNETS), but I enjoyed the Thor movie and Loki is kind-of like the ultimate emo child who should have been hugged more... except also a million times more evil? ANYWAY, I came across this fanvid the other day and not only is it perfect.... but it also means I can't listen to this soundtrack anymore without thinking about Thor and Loki and all their daddy issues.


*cough* Yes. Ok moving on then. I don't know if you noticed, but I really enjoy James McAvoy's face. Like, a lot. There is a meme going around now that consists of photoshopping kitty ears and a tail on pictures of him. (I know. I KNOW!) And he's the truly terrible thing..... it doesn't look wrong because all his photoshoots are SO RIDICULOUS anyway that he might as well already be a cat. (omg James I love your ridiculous face!)

catavoy. it's true. )

IN OTHER NON-CAT-RELATED NEWS, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy premiered in the UK. I am wildly jealous, but also a little glad that it's not here yet because I am still like 150 pages from finishing the book. The cast has soooo many awesome people (BENE! COLIN! TOM!) and the story is really good. This also meant that there were a tonnnnn of awesome premiere pictures. First, Bene has looked AMAZING at all the TTSS promo, props to whoever is dressing him these days. Second, TOM HARDY IS SUPER CUDDLY AND BASED ON THE PREMIERE PICTURES, I AM PRETTY SURE HE JUST WANTS TO HUG ALL THE PEOPLE. ALL OF THEM.

click for some tom hardy snuggles )

And now I will sign off with a picture under the cut that killed me just a little bit last night

yup.. )
fiarra: ([pretear] himeno. xray found nothing)
2011-06-26 03:31 pm

how to not be an adult (aka. the spice must flow)

Yesterday marked the height of me being an absolute failure at life. Let us go over this, shall we?

Friday night I watched Children of Dune (all 4 hours of it). Then I sat and read all the Children of Dune fanfic I could find on the internet (read: there were like 12 links). Then Manda talked me into watching Penelope (James McAvoy you are SUCH A LIFE RUINER). Then I was so wired from watching all the things that I didn't fall asleep until like 6am.

Saturday I:
- woke up at 2:45pm
- rolled onto twitter and within half an hour was starting in on the first Dune mini-series.
- sometime around 8pm I was done with that 6hours of mini-series and I made myself a salad.
- I caps-lock co-wrote some Dune/X-Men crossover crack with Manda.
- I watched Wanted (which was a shit movie, I mean... weaver assassins, really?! At least James was a total badass and Angie is pretty).
- Around 1am, I started a group rewatch of Children of Dune.
- Sometime around 5:30am I was possibly about to start hallucinating.

Then I went to bed. And I woke up today at 1pm to a loud buzzing in my room. I sleep with my door closed. My window is closed. HOW THE FUCK DID A BEE GET INTO MY BEDROOM WHILE I WAS SLEEPING. IT WAS NOT THERE WHEN I WENT TO BED.

At least I think it was a bee. It sounded like a bee and was quite large. I went for the smash into oblivion and then flush down the toilet route before I could get a good look at it.

Today, there is much paranoia.